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Status: Single
A Special Set of Skills
Could I have embarrassed my wife and kids any more?
Teen asked me if I had a bogie, and I was clueless that it meant cigarette.
Annie are you ok?
Asked my friend to travel to Zimbabwe with me to alleviate poverty. He didn't know he'd be spending his summer sewing reusable menstrual pads
Just Derby Things.
"*** this shit I'm out"
I love you guys
My dry cleaner refused to clean my pants because of cat hair and this was written on the tag.
I found a glitch in the matrix.
mfw
Cheat on you, I never did.
We all know the feel
The greatest Venn Diagram ever made
A lunar eclipse according to flat earthers
D*CK
Pepe Rises on the 3rd day
o - o
I N F I N I T Y
PSA: Dads, if you find this in your daughter's room... it IS a curling iron.
Meet The Focker
This is, without a doubt, the single greatest Teacher Appreciation Week gift I have ever received during my five year tenure as a second grade teacher.
Our receptionist has had this hanging at her desk for years. She has no idea what this is really a photoshop of.
Absolutes
I dont know if this belongs here but I laughed.
Top marks to the deer on the right for a magnificent set of antlers
Cluck
I'm pretty sure they don't even know each other #FinalsWeek
Flat earthers always make me laugh
As if death was not enough...
Make a left at the firehouse
TV Guide telling it like it is
identity crisis
Definitely the best scene of the Star Wars franchise
Went to visit the nice wild ***atoos in Australia
The stars have aligned...Snapchat finally worked on my duck.
As you can see, history was not easy for me.
Alright stop, refrigerate and listen
Uno, dos, tres! Funny and original!
no brakes on the shitpost train
This message will self destruct.
When she don't see the B
The Tumbr is aggressive
She'll never see it coming
getting that masters degree
Amazing exchange rate
This might be missing a few pieces.
Damn bourgeoisie!
I love how dogs do stupid things and look so proud
She'll never go home with him
1980-something!
This guy was selling bear onsies on the street.
Must be nice...
If you look at yourself in the mirror, are you looking at the reflection or at the mirror?
When you browsed Hugelol 5 minutes before you got on stage
We keep finding new things to do with the office bowling ball.
How men and women see color
Ground is one hell of a dangerous drug. Someone might lose a few limbs.
It's the attempt that counts
Whats that song again?
A little boy in our neighborhood went door-to-door selling homemade brooms for $2. Even demonstrated the effectiveness of it! Needless to say...
¯\_(ツ)_/¯
RIp pepe...
Goose bumps
Meshuggcken, my first post after years of regular observation
Just like the simulations
The fact!!
I'm so ready for October.
How To Hug
Bring your child to work day.
Hello and goodbye
Mysteries of the ocean
Robot tries...
And they are still going to be excited about it
It was JarJar all this time
No forks given
Been waiting to post this!
Something tells me they aint diggin for gold
When you use the wrong cheat code in GTA.
When "she" says
I remember my first time
Party never ends
that
Seemed like the obvious answer
Always a Little Worrying...
updoc
Art on internet
Google is ***ing useless
Dejavu... oh wait
Research shows
The philosophers of our generation
No seriously...
How wonder women hides her sword
It's all ogre now
when a psychic reads my mind
yes
( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
Glorious Leader
Fight the bourgeoisie