My thighs smell like flowers too, but they don't answer my phone for me, which is a good thing, as I cannot speak with my *** yet

Finish reading / browsing / talking, press side button, pocket. Done

Your approach reminds me of my colleague who couldn't convert to keeping his phone in his trouser pocket after seeing the iphone bending video. He always kept it in a random jacket pocket, so every time he sat down or bent over to pick something up, his phone would slide out and hit the floor. It was funny for the first dozen times. Now we just avoid the subject