The loudest thing ever created by man

A very British haiku

Roasted by Google Assistant

My neighbours an ***. I figured this note was appropriate.

Maybe it’s time to change the name

Kids are glorious

Salty

No fools here

Minneapolis Catholic Church posted this in response to last night’s last second touch down

Cleaning the gene-pool one pod at a time.

My friend found this gem on her windshield. She says she deserved it.

D E G E N E R A C Y

De-evolution of my will to live

The duality of human nature in action

Smelly fingers

He must have had a kink

Googled "Jennifer Aniston topless" and was not disappointed.

The truest thing on the internet

This is why you should have stayed in school.

Now I realize why my dad used to hide in the bathroom. You’re never alone.

Are you feeling lucky?

Look Dad, I solved it!

Dont!

Gotta love that sunny January weather!

chirp chirp

I knew it....

Family-friendly

I agree

Ancient math

open your eyes

This sign at my vet

the perfect breed

I think the oil change place is hinting that I should clean the junk out of my car

this is why i removed the speakers from my laptop

ice cream-ception.

My GF's obsession with cheesy cursive signs inspired me to make my own uninspirational signs

meme aids

Top Kek

2 nanoseconds before a lion cub passes away

Because Batman

Medieval humour – Abbey of Sainte Foy, Conques, c1050

Blind-ing Light

Don't they don't trust him with the truth

aurora borealis

My local supermarket is pro-choice.

the monster

Finally

"Steven got lung cancer""

Classic Cyanide & Happiness

Light roast

The four horseman of 2018

the sheep and the wolf

its true

because of what are they scared then

is the 'me' referring to the lightbulb or the person

This sequel is delicious.

Bon Jovi gives terrible gifts

My kind of pickup line

Netflix knows exactly what picture to use to get the youth interested in Friends.

Saw this on the drive home. Only in the Midwest would this be a thing.

HIHG GROUND

hes got this bois

Da thot wae...

In Russland there is no equality only Putin

who dis haha

when you intentionally make your life harder

93% Match

Or my dignity....

really dog? really?

small loan of 5 bucks

oh god

Bello!

My aunt took this photo of her's and her son's dog

Just how i like my strawberries

Fallout tropica

"like I usually do"

Doctor's tips

Some next level snitchery

I gave my 2 year old a slice of cheese to eat while she was watching some Paw Patrol. Then I checked on her a minute later...

Caught my kitten either mid yawn or mid transformation into the creature from The Thing.

Unexpected electric blanket review

Wholesome Space

Found a good spot for this sticker at last

First color image of Mars

Where we're going we don't need roads

Shout ding, dong really loud

Realistic Foosball

This woman was pushing her older husband on Costco cart just for fun and gave us a thumbs up as they passed

the last melonbender

More grown up than Bart

My 8 year old couldn't find his beloved teddy bear; turns out he accidentally left him at my Dad's house. This is the text my Dad sent to let us know he found the bear......

Brooklyn Nine-Nine has a lot of great lines, but this is my favorite.

Treat yo self

A woman gotta do what a woman goota do...

huehuehue

Already on sale in a Maui gift shop

You know what they say, whatever totes your scrote

I don't think someone is getting off the train...

Can you beat him ?

Maybe she is just fat