A moron shut down my hospital for 2 hours by bringing in an umbrella with a sword hilt handle. I reacted the best way I knew how, by making commemorative t-shirts for my whole department.

Damnit, Toby!

If you think weather is crazy, Alabama doesn't know what to do.

Who Would Eat This?!

Hair Maketh the Man

"You betta do right"

Immediately following an ancient dad joke

Must have this recipe

campus security posts this alert on facebook

kill me.

Everyone's dream car. Oh yeah and a Ferrari is here too.

No jo věž babylonská

Dangers in the world...

Water tank pig

it’s a real pain indeed....

BI CHI CHI

The administration has decided there will be no more snow days

My life in 1 image

bamboozled

This is why i have trust issues.

A small fraction

God is a cat

When life comes at you fast

Racist doggo

Found the source of the horrified wolf tattoo

the future is now

Damn

This one is for Downudder.

“Mooo”hahahahaah oh shit

Rotating is Caring

A voice for the people

gottem

When the us finds out Van Gogh used oil for his paintings

This is my all time favorite greentext

Sorry, today's Google Doodle, all I see is Space Hitler

Pay respect to our fallen americans

The real story.

Whatcha got there?

And today is?

Trust me is gonna melt steel memes

I am not coming quietly

Did they?

Relatable

Das ist sehr richtig

*"it aint me" intensifies*

He already has a wife, so fake I say?

Simple mistake

The tattoo artist and this guy they should never drive a car.

Coffee maker NOT hot

Vintage iPhone cases

shine of his guns

Me too string, me too

Did this *** really just toss me?

oops

I let my husband decorate the bathroom.

Translation of the game's title is "Don't lose sight of yourself"

Not toast?

Until they start drilling, that is

Levelling up

racist

Scare the shit out of everyone

Hi hungry, I’m dad

Why Russia hates Germany

hell yeah

Denise, keeping it real

The art of fitting in

Backwards tunasub

Oh god why

A coworker left after 23 years where I work, this was his gift to his boss.

My wife got a random text today, so she responded appropriately

Haha yeah

Not Mine - just wanted to share the joy

How the dinosaurs really died.

Campires have feelings too

Ringo Starr executed today for treasonous use of a British submarine.

Easter for the North East this year...

This Harvard grad is building a luxury weed business...

My brother sent this to me and said he bought a “hipster drone”

Can't blame him, he just wants a soul

Now with more lyrics

Everyone loves Dee's nuts

The newest Harry Potter book just came out

Not sure how to feel about this honey container

What flavor is this?

What Terrible Service!

My cats are apparently horrified at my staggering amount of credit card debt. Poor little guy in the back almost threw up.

As an enlisted I can tell you this is completely true....

Cat falling off a table

Weather forecast today sounds all too familiar :(

Whoa, Black Betty!

I went out of town for a few days and came home to my dog who seems to want to have a word with me about it.

Hybrid Summons!

Interested in my religion?

Preparing for the future

Gearbox types

I'm a doggosauresrex, 2 years old, and a terrifying rawr.

Tough choice.

Content Warning

It was cheaper than a Toblerone

The secret of Chinese legends about dragon revealed