Daily Fortune

“Nobody here but us Asian pears...”

REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

So. I just came to public toilets and then some kind citizen left a sign of no toilet paper. Thank you kind citizen!

I get it now... I think

and cum sauce

accurate

A conversation I had with brainyrs

He alrite fo a white boi

My biggest fear exposed

I get home from work today and the $@&*# Mother in Law parked right in the middle of the god damn driveway again!

The real treasure is the friends we made along the way

This is NOT a repost

Always remember to smile.

You guys are ok in my book

Curbside problems

:^)

It's time God comes back from his trip to the corner store

Oh no!... Unless...

If I could sell it..

The Procedure

Mm.

Adele waiting on you all to break up so you listen to her music

My treasure

yam

SHEISSE

Like, is this real?

Every Godzilla film

E M B R A C E

Real germans know its true

Take away in Cape town SA

It will be a beautyful day

Exactly that

Seems appropriate with the market opening in a couple hours

hmm

I wish my father would have packed my lunch different today

Dag

Oh no, not again...

Poor guy

dex 100

It is called pro gamer move

Wholesome

WTF who are you????????

I will totally drink to that

Never mess with watermelons

We love and support you Mr. Werewolf

coff

Trading Places

Mandate

Pop sex symbols make so much more sense to me now

Zero Sum Game

My girlfriend likes to check my search history from time to time... left her all of this.

alpha

winged hussars want to know your location

We are all Skywalkers

With all my respect to the dog,yes or no?

Ready for launch

Asked my friend how her lockdown was going having dealt with a fresh litter of 4 cats and and a lively 3 year old.. this was the response I got. Face says it all.

And here we have a rare glimpse of the mother allen key nursing her young.

lel

think for yourselves ffs

Good thing you have that warranty

I’m dying! I’m dying! I’m dying!

just ignore the anal furry vore haha :D

This truck has a jellyfish launcher

l a m p - o i l

I hope others find this as funny as I did.

Front page of the Sunday paper.

kids...

other peoples -" I do not let my pets on the furniture" ----------- this is Our Dog

Why you gotta do me like that

I love you Jesus Christ.

Should had gotten a sitter that night

Turns out the Neon Bible was right

The years have not been kind to my gears

y e s

Reflection view from toilet looks like cookie monster.

I am slowly going crazy 123456 switch

A question as old as time

careful on my edges, normalfag scum

Groots hot new GF

We will build an army

End of the fellowship

A misspelling so bad that I had to Google it just to make sure it wasn’t a real word I’ve never heard of

Game Spot

I now have plans for next weekend

DNA for gummies

Makes sense to me

Why Wear A Mask?

lel

Classy architecture

You guys understand, right?

If dogs had Tinder

:^)

YAMETE

Daniel Craig attending the opening night of No Time To Die.

Chicken and Chicken Zip

First letter

Saw this in the clinic today.

TIL that I'm a jellyfish...