Me to her, after I nut

What does she smoke to look like that at 29?

And don't forget the "I'm sorry that you're having this issue. I'm a certified MS expert MVP and I'll be helping ypu solve this problem today. Here's 3 more paragraphs of useless storytelling before I get to a basic solution"

In dog years, that's not much

I think they're trying to say that they were originally looking for a junior role, but then after seeing the person and reassesing their needs, decided that they should instead hire for a senior role.

While it's annoying having to spend resources trying to find employment, I don't think this case is necessarily about f*cking someone over.

I hate it when they turn 25

You have one?

But only sometimes.

Yes, but only because he's gay.

Clearly, you're not an engineer. Being able to sort out problems that arise when making things cool (like this, as opposed to a bland box) is why many become engineers.