well this is interesting... I think I'll be professional and post my modified resume.

objective: To be enlisted as a badass new moderator...obviously
skills: I can count really fast, like damn fast.
-------- I can stay up past my bed time AND still have energy.
-------- I know how to fix broken foam swords
Education: high school graduate!
--------------- Full time student at a Big 12 university - comp. sci. major
Work experience: we dont need to talk about this... But I can wash cars, and prepare silverware.
About me: My favorite color is burgundy, I'm a full time student, my favorite food is pasta, and I
-------------- enjoy making making forts out of sheets, pillows, and chairs.

But in all seriousness, I would like to me a moderator.