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My intentions with you too
Sp0n
Unexpectedly, out of no where comes the real joker
July 4th Checklist
You're gonna stand there and own a firework stand, and tell me you dont have any...
I like to leave our giant sock monkey posed for the wife to find. She's never as amused as I am.
Blame it all on Millennials
do not disappoint us son
SPEECH : 100
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My Dad's condiments based on Sodium and Enjoyment
Shrekposting
think before you abort
Chris Chrisco
Why cyclists wear black shorts
Shots firefoxed!
When you're not quite done Bamboozlin'
That's my boi
Knock knock
Found this while helping my 5 year old son clean his room.. He said it's for "just in case."
Flash will crash if he is in rush
He's a HLer
Just magic
You're gonna need 2 Hands
Hood feud!
*** that cute puppy shit
crikey!
Hangin' out
Baugettemarine motha***aaaa
Shrek is love, Shrek is tolerance
How to annoy your wife 2.0. I had to improvise the S when I ran out of sequin pillows. :(
Relatable
no swearing
Girls are always banana cup after they talk with me
My friend's sister-in-law received her new license plates this week. Here is what the DMV sent her...
Searched for pineapples on Urban Dictionary. Wasn't expecting this answer, but really I shouldn't be surprised.
Dogo Please Give Me A Smile ..
How I justify not walking up to girls and asking them out
Star wars action figures are pretty brutal!
I don't think I'll be trying to get my seat back...
Im actually getting a tan this summer!!!
S I T
Chicken nuggets be like my boyfriend
Found in my town's police report...
Not bad on a state trooper's salary.
SPF 1776
it wasn't real communism, lets try again
Taking care of business - Texas style
While you were playing minecraft, I studied the blade.
Emergency exit only!!
Culture Differences
You drive a hard bargain...
It's all the same
He found god
Brb, moving to Japan.
B-But officer, she is actually 1000 years old
My brother works for the police department. He was checking the dispatch and noticed this earlier today.
S u c c
If feel sorry for laughing at this
Another Juggler gives up on his dreams...
how to make any anime
Its like a cross over episode
Homo lizardus
Effective job ad
I found this beauty in a gift shop
When you master Pinterest
My big brother saw this shoe and drew this. He calls him "The Cyclops Duck"
When you're in that sweet spot
The Asian aging process
Relatable
Best served by ourselves
The short version of The Hobbit
Deals
It's not a story the Jedi would tell you.
Diabetes Misunderstanding
Godly
Does this count as necropihlia?
Not so happy ending.
Dreaming of screaming, someone kick me out of my mind.
Closed On The 4th
Greatest knockout artists.
Correctly identifying alligators and crocodiles
Craigslist at its best
anyone see a cat?
It's Dino time!
Roommate has date coming by later and asked me to clean bc he's not home. So I made a Princess D shrine in his room
We all live in 2017, but that country leafs in 3017
Do you guys like my Eminem shirt?
Accidentally searched of "overweight car" instead of "overweight cat". This was the first result.
it's my life
You can tell by the yellow lines that this spot is for BMW parking only
Royal Guard
Equal rights and lefts
Duck God vs. Rabbit God
My friend came home from a mini-vacation and forgot to change the kitty litter. This morning she's brushing her teeth and hears a little tinkle...
Local news just shared this
Bamboozeld
Being social broke
Sucking dick is not as gay as watching anime
I'm glad they didn't do one for Bangkok.