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Parents advice......never helped
He came out, looked at me and was all "bro, do you even lift?".
It's like they're rubbing it in.
Meanwhile at Wal-Mart
I would definitely take up farming
This turtle is implying I'm not cool enough to eat with him. He doesn't want to say it, but he's definitely hinting.
The previous note in my hotel room
Snake awareness
Ezekiel Elliott
Somehow I'm not convinced...
Saturday plans be like
Windsurfer During Hurricane Irma
Is it too soon yet?
Saving money that way
It's everyday comrade
Alchemy 101
My roommates and I write erotic fridge poetry when we get drunk.
I am proud to see that my dog will protect me no matter what
Wisdom
Splitting a chocolate bar with the wife, it was pretty obvious which half was hers.
Good game
For reals! Which one of you is it?
Elon Musk was inspired by Lilo and Stitch for his new SpaceX suit
"I did not hit her, I did not"
This is how my 2.5 year old niece insists on holding her new baby brother
It works
he is a bit of a moron
I´m waiting...
My dating life in a different nutshell...
You can never beat those robots
I love my fellow Floridians.
"Traps aren't gay"
Relatable
My dog is very popular among street cats
How villains are born
Want serious answers people
I was asking myself why the hell this guy is staring at me all the time.
My friend's baby looks like he just got done working out
This beer has the best label I've ever seen.
Just so everyone is aware
(:F)
please just do it now
Google - Now hiring, no need to apply
Break line of sight...
wat was it before
Last night is a blur....
It's gonna be a big one boys!
i have 30 years of surpressed autism
Looks like hurricanes have now become sentient and self aware
Pathetic
Peasants
Fagguette
rawr XD
soon
Tony Squawk
Don't forget snow...
A necessity for camping
My dating life in a nutshell...
The elevator I was in broke down. I looked in the emergency phone box because I had no signal and this is all there was.
I don't think that's the best idea
The scene before escaping Irmalrog
What's the forecast in ft. Lauderdale Ollie?
Yup. This happened.
No one really knows
The real danger area
My Girlfriend thought she was funny....
How traffic happens
How Jesus walked on the water
Respecting woman is number 1 priority!!!!
thank you japan
magic trick in the comments
There is really an "I" in TEAM
Someone prepping for Irma strapped the entire house down.
Not sure if looking for sex, or actual nightstand
*Closed
Shout out to Taco Bell for holding it together during Irma
This cat makes me laugh.
Eminem meets Lady Gaga.
My buddy is pretty excited about tonight.
Walmart has really upped their camo quality.
Woah
We have a huge chance
Stupid drunk uber trip
My childhood ride replicated, blasting down a motorway.
So I asked my dad if he was going Hurricane shopping...
Neighbors went to see "It." It will be dark when they see this.
Population control
There is literally a UPS guy working out in full uniform right at my gym! Watched him deliver a package and then started lifting.
A co-workers coffee cup
How Ted Mosby tells a story
Solid marketing advice
Link needs his sword
Man's best manager
Local bar's breathalyzer replacement
Mad Max: Jersey Road
When you're evacuating Miami and you can only take what's most important to you.
Lol, bye.
Just keep playing
oh so thats why she lost
L'Otters