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Apparently Stewie Griffin works at my hospital....
California problems
CAAARRL
The vet did a perfect job capturing our animals personalities on their ID tags.
I hope they don't notice
I asked my dad to make me a wallpaper, this is what he sent me...
ａｓｔｈｅｔｉｃ Ｓ Ｈ Ｅ Ｌ Ｄ Ｏ Ｒ
"Listen. You is kind. You is smart. You is important..."
They change so fast
Literature
This pic I took of my dog looks like a crime scene photo.
My girlfriend thought this was an accurate description of me. I'll have to explain to her when I see her later why she's wrong.
Two tickets to Atlanta please :v
Struck by the divine light ...
Interesting flyer
Higher level casting: Thot Protection
I thought something smelled funny on the road today
Apple revealed they worship the Many Faced God
things that go bump in the night
Dad's method to guarantee responsible driving
iPhone X...
Catholic grandma
Pranke'd
Whenever Apple announces a new iPhone, all I can think of is this.
If traps are gay then...
Can someone explain me why this is gay ?
He was just hungry
Spotted in my institution's natural sciences building.
Attack on car insurance
How brave of you
My father in law told my nephew he would buy him an Xbox when he learns to ride a two wheeler. Not getting it today.
The smell of whiskas awakens an ancient evil
My girlfriend saw this "Prius" on her commute yesterday.
White pple trynna pull sht
Powerful video
** Autistic screeching**
Leave me alone
Best NO PARKING symbol
damn foreigners
Me too
¯\_(ツ)_/¯
Just u wait....
Mars Rover = $800 Million; Team to Operate = $1 Billion; Drawing a Dong on The Surface of Another Planet = Priceless.
A no BS approach to getting rich quick.
Ted has the right to explain himself
The most Australian out of service tag
we all I.T down here
Before Tinder
They're not dick pics, they're..
Hard maths
The Giant Quacken has been defeated
And that's how we get a camel
Relatable
Women Empowerment!!!
The police log when you live in a small town.
Historic moment
I love this friend.
All-natural umbrellas are the best
When the hotel staff has your back
Jerry finally landed his dream job
Ain't seen nothing truer..
get out
The photo lab at my local Walmart
Two Monks...
There is a really good chance I would reach in there
The new artworks positioning at our local Skate Country is slightly questionable...
Count to ten
When she changes her BIO to Single
Sorry, I only watch pronoun movies.
Hsssssshitpost
The most legit billboard I've ever seen.
Pabst knew I'd spend the last of my cash on beer rather than food. No worries though! They threw in a bonus!
Hey cedric if you think the circlejerk is bad what about this?
For my sister's 20th birthday
You can't see him!
In Birdperson culture that is considered a dick move
That time they posed for a great father and son work pic - but didn't put any tools in the tool belt.
The Ideal Nation
Best Captain
Doesn't look like my sort of fun
Girlfriend took a pregnancy test and sent me this...
DiCaprison
I knew she looked familiar
N-Team
My friend and his dad got separate Uber's from the same place, to the same place. Spot the difference.
That's what is missing
Finally...
Best way to get past Apple's new facial recognition on the iPhone X
How my family handled Irma.
Fishing for compliments
Miami is a Mario Kart track now
My dog is...special. Somehow he got the floor vent stuck to his collar...rip'd it off the floor then walked around like this was normal.
Never thought about it this way
Ladies, your new uniforms are — oh for god's sake
She's going for the whole squad
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If you eat the Devils corn, you will choke on his cob.
Even heroes have herpes
Oops! my mistake
So my dad wore a green shirt to the Empire State Building tour...