House owner: I really like Hogwarts. Engineer: Say no more!

Our Flag is Sacred

Anon buys condoms

My stepson is a minimalist with the crayon, but the story he tells is very grand.

Lazy Genius

Not all Presidents cared if you took a knee

My dog "worked" at Lowes with me for a day

/tv/ is a child

Just give me one Episode

Doctor's advice

Not Pockets

the sky is the limit

Take a nap, anytime... anywhere!

I bet you are..

Pure evil..

Passive aggressive gas pump will give you your goddamn receipt.

Luck be in the air tonight

The wrong Harry

This was in my dentist's waiting room.

Designated crying area in my university's testing center

Make grass legal

i found a place wher trumps hair grow

tap tap boom

Please do not tap on the glass...

I picked my dog up from the groomers and my cat isn't too pleased I brought her back

Bad to the bone!

How to Unholy Abomination

EXERCISE, NEVER BEEN EASIER,....

I don't remember seeing this Ladybird book ...

It's not stupid if it works!

Random tweet

Girlfriend and I finally got the shot of our dreams

When you let your teenage daughter order the pizza.

Someone let an AI choose the colors and names for paints. Don't do that.

hawt

"Could I just try a little sample?"

My elderly resident couldn't remember where she put her tv remote, here's where I found it

We went swimming with the dolphins. My wife was terrified. I loved it. Here was her birthday present

These radiation vests for female astronauts are mildly-topographical.

No, you hang up.

Potty trained

Russian dove

What's that you're looking at?

A comment on an online pizza order

Dammit Schrodinger

They've been hiding out together this entire time?

Ｂ Ｅ Ｐ Ｅ Ｓ

Please don't confuse the two...

Is it sir?

The private bathroom stall at our local bar

Surprise attack

Prayers Answered

Took me a second

Anon messed up

haha yes

Waiting for my Physiotherapist and thus caught my attention

You get what you do

Black Translator

Was getting ready to pay for my groceries when I saw this...

Title

smooth af

Not on my watch young boi

F-Funny

You are never safe

Nice to see you again, Freddie!

Rocking dat ass.

Bruh...

The rural urban basic ***es

average loli viewer

Just act like it never happened.

Every Craigslist buyer ever

I've been training all my life for this.

A E S T H E T I C

When you find out what paper's made out of

omae wa mou shindeiru?

Real talk... Tom Cruise kind of looks like Dern from Jurassic Park

I've never had a club photo that's captured me quite so accurately.

When you ask who the good boy is.

You know your Kroger is in the 'hood when...

Karmadillo

Strive for excellence

Ruins of an ancient civilization

I'm traveling with a friend. Our hostel room has an interesting "feature"

anon orders titanic

Some great proof reading in my local newspaper.

O Johnny, you rascal

Entrepreneurs selling hot dogs in front of a Ban Meat at Berkeley stand

Salvation for dummies

Some people should never have been given photo software

This restaurant gets it

I won't do what you tell me

parting gift, wish you all the best

Now they tell me, I've been putting it under my pillow for years.

This guy knows exactly what he wants.

Such mom, much spagheti

Advertisement is dark as hell

It's that time of the year, folks!

Who's up for a movie marathon?

The look of pure regret as he jumped on to a responding police cruiser in my city.

My daughter working on her De Niro impression.