Trying to save an ailing drooping cactus, I've splinted it and it now resembles the oldest pole dancer in history.

My social life right now

A message for instastrippers. We know.

I confirm this

Keanu Reeves is a Saint

Some handy tips

Interesting times we live in

NOOOOOOOOOOOOO

A rare chance

Congratulations to Mama Fratelli for coaching the New England Patriots to their 6th Superbowl Championship.

This 19 year old poster at my local library

Hey Capt, really?

Stop trying to hurt me Facebook!

be woke

This Irish feast

Doggo forgot how to dog

These people who parked on the ice before it melted

When your entire country posses power to say N word

What’s the best boat name you’ve seen?

So close, Doris. So close.

Dont knock it til you try it

Growing up in a small town is weird

Why computer... WHYYYY

His reply : And you look like a cocaine user

I don't think so...

Proud Mom

Without a doubt the worst boomers I've ever heard of

the wonderful squirrel fable

Prepare my KATANA .

End up doing that every damn time

Upset Stomach Intensifies

Love this dude

Go hard or go home!!!

This sign in front of our Engineering lab. Sounds about right.

Day 183 : They still clean me everyday without noticing..

I finally hit my goal weight!

All-Time Classics

3543544543 IQ

Perfect Answer!!!

ancient-summon

That's all you needed to say

Musical Chairs

Something looks wrong

He vs. She

It's dangerous to go alone.

Sneak 10000

Should I keep the stray cat I found

Best feature (besides having a cat daughter wife)

It doesn't get more real than that

fukc the Imperials

Live in the moment!

It was just a sniffle

Feel better yet?

Really got it nice and clear

Fast Food Banter

Burned to ashes

Can never be too sure

One case that Animal protection cannot solve

How T-shirts are made

The ideal Uber ride

Shut up nerd.

YouTube

Thought of sharing -

A *DOG*

What smells

Software engineers like

Yes or No

Always check the temperature first

My parents should appreciate me

Hello girls

You stay

Well, it's interesting

Please don't

British Florida then?

Just getting on with my day as usual.

Maybe not always

I trust you

Good for you brian

Illusions!!!

Watch were you step

Great guy

"I'm as surprised as you are!"

I diagnose that with epic

LOOUUIIISSAAA JEENNNKKIINNSSS

I can do this! I CAN!

No r*pe jokes

Suprise!!!

Delet dis

When I try to hit on a girl

I'm smart every one and a while.....

My moms text to my sister

I mean..

He gots the flu

Hehe into the wind

Gamer moment

Nice beard man !

Because i don't want to be banned

Finally someone has come to his senses

What's legal is illegal now

Well my day just got better