Well I guess thats a case of the grass is always greener on the other side. I much prefer the mountains and love to go on hikes.
When I was living near Stuttgart, I went wandering around the countryside every other day. I mean, ocean is great too, but in a competition, I would always go for mountains ^^
But visit austria, never actually been there.

Im born in 93 and all of those things went up in flames within the last couple weeks

I actually thought about that a lot. I have two friends in Norway who try to get me to come over there and live with them (Im german).

I kinda wish I was able to do so. But I have my studies here and my best friend, which I wont leave for anything in this world.
He is the sole reason I couldnt leave this town, everything else is debatable, but I cant stand the thought of not beeing near him anymore.

Best I can do is new part of town and meeting a lot of new people. Fortunatly, I live in Hamburg and there are plenty of both ^^

Haha, I really appreciate you douple checking on this, thank you!
Im pretty sure that I will never be suicidal again, atleast not seriously.

Yeah, it was touch and go for the last half year. She wasnt happy with some things and realized she wanted to end this relationship. Then she came to the brilliant idea to treat me like shit for month, because in her mind the breakup wouldnt hurt that much then. Quite an idea, let me tell you.

There are lot of issues I could name now, but in short, we grew appart. I felt like I evolved into a better version of myself, while she was making steps backwards.
Also, as I´ve said before, she betrayed me in multiple ways. She broke aggrements we´ve had and even lied to me about some mayor things. Which is a very big deal for me, because I was in therapie for years, partially because of my big trust issues.

But oh well... We are still on speaking terms and tell ourselfs that we still like each other, but I sometimes feel like the last half a year I´ve had a relationship with a stranger. Which didnt make it easier, I was eager to sort things out. She wasnt. Part of the problem.

Even if it were so, that we could go back and try again, I wouldnt do it. Not with the person I´ve lived with for the last half a year. But still, I miss the time before that, so god damned much.

Today I´ve had to sort through my pictures on my phone for something and scrolled past some pictures of us on christmas and such. I immidiatly broke down, it still hurts a lot. Havent looked at my phone since.

My logic thinking isnt helping either, I know its better this way, but I dont feel that way.

And I cant really go into healing mode, since now Im in survival mode again, trying my best to have a room and food.

Thank you all for listening and coming to my talk, autographs will be given at the exit

Yeah, it was our choice, but a more logical one than emotional one. Im the more emotional part, I still didnt really want it to end, even though it was the "correct" thing to do.

There have been some reasons, I wouldnt even know where to start. But one of them was, that she betrayed me in a way I wont be able to fully trust her again, which is a huge part for me and my trust issues. Of course, there have been some more, obviously I had my faults aswell, but I just feel too exhausted to talk about everything ^^

Maybe type it out someday and post it, right now Im just happy to share and beeing heard. Or read rather

Yeah, we´ve tried to fix things. I thought we could make amends, but she didnt think so. And in the end, I think it was the right call. I dont trust her anymore, she really betrayed me on a deeper level.

It just still hurts, almost my entire adult life was this relationship. I feel like there is a sizeable chunk of myself missing. And the fact that I dont want this relationship back, wont stop it hurting.

My fiance and I broke up a month ago. Been living with friends since. Need to find a job to pay for an apartment, but cant work fulltime since Im not allowed to as a student. So Im stuck here. Government really bends you over and ***s you hard if you dont work and create shareholder value by 30.

10 years of relationship, of building a life together... gone.

Im trying so hard not to plunge myself into the familiar pit of despair, but on a friday night, when everyone else is having fun and celebrating beeing alive, its very hard.

Worst part? I feel only comfortable talking about how I feel with strangers on the internet. what the *** man

Still, Im giving my best to be positive, give me another beer and mead. And some for the bloke next to me, because its only alcoholism if you drink alone.

Wanna know how I got these burns?