Good thing my profiile picture is a Taco!

Ironic

Our 6 year old made us another Christmas card. She was confused at our excitement for this one.

My cat looks like hes waiting for you to get his bad joke.

Stop buying axe in general.

Suicide Squad - Extended Cut

Just wanted a good intense game but ughhhh

Flawless desing 2

Spotted today...

When you got a formal dinner at 5 but army training at 6

:thinking:

This is how an Italian retaliates against scooter-asses

gottem gud

Relatable

I let her paint my nails cause she digs it, but this day I couldn't stop farting to save my life.

Wasn't really planning on it

DON'T LOOK

z u c c

You are a cool guy, dont come tomorrow

Gisus

Rookie move Slagathor.

There's two kinds of cat...

I'm having second thoughts about filling my prescription...

Sign at my local liquor store

End goal for +$100K in debt

Sophisticated edge, the best kind of edge

Asking the important questions about bed frames.

.... ah, crap

Well Thank-You !!

Very inspiring! Do not ever forget it!

Minions of Darkness

Another reason why I'm not sure my in laws like me. My stocking is not only separate from theirs, it is on the other side of the furniture.

Killing time at the airport and all of the sudden...

So this happened last night...sorry Wendy’s

You play good boy and I play human

Finally! An honest yard sign

Muhahahahaha hip hop take over

All I want is your company

Damn router

Tell me the last thing you stuck your finger in.

Nobody calls them that. Not one person.

Some of the students from our school got locked in the court yard by accident and couldn’t get back in. This was their solution.

I patched the hole in my door

Annnnddd now it's stuck in my head.

“Would you like to name your personalised stocking?”

Somebody regrets their decision

Latest Internet Policy

Ancient evil wants a treat

Is that Tina from Bob's Burgers off to the right?

Milf is short for Milfionaire

You don't know how to use a tape measure?

This has been circulating in my Discord

Ah yes, THAT episode

How dare they touch the clothes to use the dryer!

Was kind of hoping for a fortune, but that works too.

Stephen forgets that he isn’t on the Internet

"Not even dishonesty can tarnish the shine of profit." - The Ferengi Rules of Acquisition

You ain't a train

Doctor Strange’s lesser known origin story.

In addition to a kids menu, my local dive bar also has a gender and species neutral bathroom

soup

Time to move out...

French ads are terrifying

What goes around comes back around

Parking advice

This house looks like an Orthodox Jew.

Jopost

Do it

Day 16 : Michael sure knows ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

Updated for 2018

Nicest Mom or Incest Mom?

Define your role

In the East Orient, born and raised...

Don't worry California, I got you

Google can be funny sometimes

"My grandma got a label maker"

The answer is right there

RIOT WITH ME!

When you show up to a fight and bring your boys with you

...

Don't worry, you can still get service...for money

I hope I'm this cool when I grow up

Came Wit The Posse

ben is a hoe

Apparently you can request a visit from Mormon missionaries. And I thought someone might like to make some new friends...

Found this flyer near my apartment. And I thought it was my cat eating all of the arachnids...

i think i missed my stop

No longer do I need to wonder, woman.

We need an updated version for 2018.

Just keeping it real

Ah Roger, my kinda guy

eyy

Tip jar at my local pizza joint

This mug from the University of North Texas

No joke. She fought through it for a full minute before bringing it to us and saying the tooth paste was gross.

"Monty Python Life Of Brian is still relevant today"

Here’s my ticket, don’t wake me....

Bad boys, bad boys

Comcast knows how to get my wallet out

The *** son of Jon Snow and Sam Tarly