Every year my flaccid cactus erects itself.

Will - championed !

My fiancé has a rivalry with the cat...

When she asks if you wanna see the kitty ;)

Hairswap!

Tech support life

One of my friends went to PAX East dressed as Guy Fieri

They should make underwear that says this, right ladies?

When you’re a nice guy, but your shadow is a chad.

I agree Bubbles

"I need your clothes, your boots, and your popemobile.”

Wanna start a fight?

Someone get schwifty with me

That good good

Scale of things up close

Best senior yearbook ad. Ever.

Thanks, Jim.

When you sneaking around at 2 am and stub your toe

Get in loser we’re going crying

I think I broke the internet...

When I see a post that made it to the top

The Evolution of Thanos

Being neighbors doesn’t make you friends

The Newton Dilemma

According to the instructions, I have everything necessary to build this cheap furniture

Bork souls

got me there

The Face Of A Killer

Danny

Best voice acting performance, ever. part 1

Girlfriend brought home this strange looking bra today. Apparently it’s for T-cups

Post

Celebrities and their baby pictures

Not Haunted

Well, Summer?

:joy:

Post

You're not the boss of me now

A menu that doesn't sugar coat.

Imperial Measurement

Just got a new shower curtian. I hope my kids like it

When your jedi training finally pays off

So like, how do I apply?

When two friends you introduced to one another start hanging out without you

Sometimes life doesn't find a way

At least they're not Giant Enemy Crabs, I guess

Sorry Pikachu, guess we have to go somewhere else

Me too

Ctrl C, Ctrl V

This certainly rings a bell or two.

A sign at my local ice cream store

Every time I turn on my computer

A good sense of humor

Raw sauce

Some people like to live on the edge

This is sickening

OwO

My wife got me and my baby matching t-shirts!

No u

Micropenis confirmed

Always wear a seatbelt kids

His psalms are sweaty

The majestic.......

am lost

Most accurate definition of adulthood.

Animal Farm notice

Really. He’s cool...

I really hate musicals

Hummmmmm

Dogs of peace

Missing part included!

Pickpocket: 100

so that's what happened to the Beatles

Riddle of the Sphinx

Spent exactly 20 seconds on this one boys

Dammit Fluffy!

War never changes...

aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahh

Newborn Yelp reviews

That something to look forward to...

its your turn now

Clap Clap

What type of haircut did the suspect have?

THE ACCURACY OF THIS IS 100%

The guy my math teacher was talking about

Here’s another one of those adoption profiles

He didn’t want our data... he just wanted to be our friend. Why couldn’t we all just be his friend?

Why do I feel like something wrong with this name?

Chemistry rocks!

THE FLASHBACKS CAW CAW

#husbandshaming

The greatest name in any credits for a movie.

Me doing math

When you think criminal names aren't obvious enough.....

10$ ? 9.5$ ?!!

Finally, my signature scent is back in stock

Don't pick up the phone... Im online!!!

Spotted the flu running around town

The poor kid

Pop Idols