Time to update my resume

Reeeeeee

it's a dangerous item

Save of the century

The Wizard of Oz was a much darker movie than I remember.

Kaaaaameeee haaaameeeee HA!

Where he at

I l l e g a l

Need to try Wahlburgers

thats the spirit

It's funny bc nobody can spell benderact cucumberpatch

I switched out all my co-worker's cheat sheets while he was out.

he should have made the whole performance

And about me too

"Detach blow-cables!”

This is wack

takes M to feel in touch with nature

"Babe, just hologram in to work tomorrow."

It’s tax season baby.

A true visionary

theory

She watched it snow so long she became snow herself...

So uh, my dad left the sprinkler on.

Mistakes were made

Uncle Ben!!!

they disrespect us

My Life ._.'

Pain Chart at the Docs office today

My attempt to get a new trash can without making a phone call.

You were gone so long

They really do grow up too fast

Dad sneezes are a force of nature

It's like that sometimes

Very good boi

100% battery

Chucky's little sister

I don't think it worked well last time

Everyone should do their homework!

Nemo died!

It ain’t much but it’s honest work

The terribles

I’d rather be a baby

After thousands of years, humans are still being played like a fiddle.

Today is my 36th bday. This was my fave card, from my 9 year old daughter

The new wake & bake

Close enough

Bored at office? Got an idea for you!

Kebab Man

Sorry buddy

Dammit, Abby!

Only at GameStop

swim trunks

I’m all for equal treatment

Still figuring out the correct way

That’s cute

Last night I got high as *** and started cleaning the house top to bottom. Seemed like a waste of a high until this morning...

It's treason

Thank you Randy Savage

Great start

When you’re evil but use your powers for good

Wow, they sure are angry

Am i hired?

Teacher understands the true potential of his students.

So It's Like That

Aminals Dump

Thank you for sorting by new

I don't think they thought this sign through

Run for it

My cat is an idiot but adorable <3

sverd

BEYOND IT I SAY

Sikh sense of humor

They did nazi that coming

The only dick pic to slip past online censors

Three inches is three inches...

Americans:

But there’s only one seat.

I want that genie

Alien vs. Predator

What kind of man or woman would ypu like?

My Owner Sleeps All Day

Booting challenge.

I had a few takes at this

Baby shark

Ma girl

Times really have changed.... it seemed like yesterday....

This picture hung sideways in a McDonald’s

It’s almost that time!

How could I..

My sister made me my own version of my favorite picture

More like Lil Dumbass Tee

No they're gross and leave their nasty residue on everything they touch.

Tin Roof Rusted

An Interesting Menu for my Family's wedding

Repectkz

Skrrrrt

Disney our Lord

Christian pasta

what realm is this!

Creative genius