You wanna hear a joke about pizza? [OC]

Where are you damn jellyfish

I forgot that Mike Wazowski had only one eye

What would Spotify do with a drunken sailor?

Bass....

Thinking out of the box

No you dont

Brought my dog in to get groomed and they gave him the Joe Dirt.

To be fair one is definitely better than the other

Saw this card in a shop today.

Sphagetti

What they're really doing up there

Well, makes perfect sense to me!

I legitimately would 100% get behind this

The King himself has returned

A lot of people are asking for my mask recommendation

When we got there to bail him out he wouldn't even look at us.

My kinda place

Good heavens they're multiplying

They come from Sirius

Only effective if you put it on right

My derp of a dog caught on camera going to bark at the neighbour's dog but couldn't clear the flower pot

Cat jokes.

AVP

Yess!

Black is such a happy color

Encore

I laughed so ***ing hard at this

Old pic of people eating in a restaurant back in 2019

That could be us guys

Cats love doing that

The Kraken

Already started testing myself again today

I'm so scared

Saber time

Coming soon to a home theatre near you

Mass

It's an inside joke.

Loud pipes

Inspirational messages in our toilet

small town.

gone

Breaking out the good china to impress your enemies

Grandma’s are amazing

Anybody want to come to Brazil with me?

Look. I just had to share.

I just made this, it’s not a repost

Can't wait!

〜(꒪꒳꒪)〜

versus

My Amigo looked just like the sign, we couldn't help it.

If I can't eat 7000 calories a day I don't want to live

Always like this...

Meanwhile in Iceland

Back in my day

Handshakes bad

Grow a pair, bro

Its a bird! It's a plane...

I'm ready to die

My 14yo son drew this on his bedroom door whiteboard last night...

Russian jesus

Just now in online class a classmate used the raise my hand feature and when the teacher called on him he said he was just stretching

Plastic Eating Caterpillers

I wish I may, I wish I mi...oh shit oh shit shit shit shit!

Sounds like a good day

New sign went up in the neighbourhood. Wonder what her sign says?

Cracked the code.

My brother is going back to work today. I hope he makes friends.

What're you gonna do about it

A sign at a bar.

Flat as an earther

Parents gave me a gift for college today, which was all the money that my mom found in my pockets when doing my laundry.....

Ass hooker

Prepping for my colonoscopy tomorrow

My dog escaped. Showed up at the front door with unopened nachos.

Devils

Cant live with these regrets

Would be a real shame guys

My brother and I did one of those "recreation of a baby picture things"... It's not quite as cute as others I've seen.

That’s some solid advice right there.

Just a birds nest in a tree.

Dangerously Nice

Nothing personal, pal. It's just business.

My son turned 1

Oh! Now I understand why women go to the loo in pairs.

After years and years, someone finally found the square root that teachers were looking for.

Inconvenient therefore unreliable

This man's seen some shit

Xylophobia

Monday life lesson

Not that I'd want to do that either

Pretty much...!

Dear Diedre...

Never trust anyone

Hi Mark. I'm dad.

I'd like to buy one racism please

*Terminator music starts playing in the background*

Some genius put googly eyes on this Rachel Ray display in Walmart.

suddenly i‘m a bee

I miss Digimon