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My life now:
I’m about to spray my new kitchen cabinets.
Stole it
"The hottest character."
deer needs you to recover his chest of oats
Much improved. So upgrade.
I just realized the wife has these jars next to her sink.
humans are strange
Best Halloween costume ever.
The Carriers: *cracks knuckles* you're about to lose you s p i n e
You are the next one
Got here just in time! Nearly got locked in!
Orange sus
: (
How dare they make themselves presentable
***
It's a feature
Confused Jerry
That Speech Means Everything To The Team
How dogs act when someone’s at the door
that happened actually
I feel bad for that one guy
Ruining all the fun
Rachel Dolezal begins to identify as black
Cue Laverne and Shirley theme song
hush-hush
My friend wanted ghosts painted on her nails for Halloween. Unfortunately they look like sperm.
Those freaking BMW drivers.
Just watched a pizza get delivered to the kitchen door of a McDonald's. It seems that they are not, in fact, "lovin' it".
They really liked him
My todo list
Well, any contradictions?
Ahhh
I love not being an average league player
Spooky Meme #808
Sometimes I just feel hangry
Now I need a surgery!
What a timeline
ONLINE AND OFFLINE SCREAMING
I can usually tell which neighbors have cats from their windows.
I told an ai bot to design a hyper realistic chicken nugget
Posted in staff bathroom at hospital
No nut November is coming
Seeing my dog everywhere…
Blaming fans/movie goers is a strong sign the whole thing sucks
Chris Pratt is a voice actor.
Classy
***
I’m the best! Waaaaaaaaa
I made a whatsit!
2080s elderly fashion
Good on you Pablo.
He technically is though
The US government is wild
Local brewery nails October marketing.
I still have scars
IT classes, the guy in front of me is taking notes in Paint.exe
Literally, never ever again.
so hyped for the mario movie
My genuine reaction to the trailer
Somebody said he looks like a hammerhead shark in the first picture - I can’t unsee it!
a conversation i overheard.
The movie is way off
Unconventional
FRANCHISE EXPANSION!
Got y’all mofos sweating my drip is so hard
Got change?
Like, it's pure history Scoob
shit is so good
It’sa me, disappointment!
Just quit being racist duh
Vasili Arkhipov was an underrated gigachad fr
Ohh how I wish Moldavia
It’s spooky season!
Diary of a Wimpy Kid was way ahead of its time.
Maybe he doesn't like the sandwich
anyone got her sc?
Found in a portable toilet on a jobsite I delivered to
The first Suicide Hotline was set up in the 50s by a priest literally named "Chad". That's it. That's the joke.
Bro mine came back negative too, I’m so lucky
I would expect nothing less from Britain
Gone, just like that.
right now I'm on a good track
Blue >>> all other colors
Spooktober Spirit
Off to never never land
I ain't afraid of no ghosts
SHE-hulk
Look like a bad transmission
Stay classy Utah
Towl dry never does hair any favours.
Sorry demon
Itsa Meme
food food mart mart food mart
A new Mexican restaurant opened in the neighbourhood…
should have ran
too cool to be eaten
God I love cheese dip
I mean what else am I to do?