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I guess my boyfriend didn't quite understand when I said he should be the penguin...
I was called down to the office and sent home at 2nd period because ONE substitute teacher was “offended” here’s me waiting for my mom
"Guys! Found the house with the full-sized Snickers!"
My pregnant friend Lauren, everyone. Tonight she’s 35 years old, divorced, and living in a van DOWN BY THE RIVER!
In a world of Disney princesses, be a hotdog.
This is actually what it's like to be a parent sometimes. Rugrats drew a fine line between entertainment and reality.
We let our daughter choose our costumes - my wife was not too happy with hers.
My daighter was a ballerina so I dressed up as Elton John and we went as Tiny Dancer for Halloween.
When your wife got sick on Halloween but your kids really want princess Leia to go with them
My son said he wanted to be the scariest thing an adult can think of. He came up with this all on his own.
You can wear your fancy attire all you want Marie. I’m wearing the scuba suit and that’s final.
Growing up I never once questioned what the *** this device was
Her most popular costume so far!
My daughter went as me this year.
Spooky Month is almost over
Forrest Gump, Jennay! & Lt. Dan for halloween!
Today when my boss said my name 3 times
This is the cutest halloween costume!
"In loving memory" Halloween decoration
This cop dressed up as a pig for Halloween.
Bill Cosby costume
If You Get This Halloween Costume Like... The Best Ever
Who's the man?
How to torture a Vampire
Consequences of over watering every morning.
Hey Peter, whaaats happening?
WOW cokes
Viet-***ing-Nam!
The new kid at my school came in dressed as a banana today. The school lunch included a banana so naturally, everyone was donating their bananas to him
Here’s my dad at work. I think he took this year’s Halloween Costume Contest pretty seriously.
Well done sir. Well done.
My Halloween costume this year. I’ve peaked.
My teacher was dressed as Arthur
When my kids arrived at school today it was reassuring to see Batman on the roof watching over them protectively.
I was a Holy Cow two years ago
'The jealousy of Micheal Myers' - my friend draws these so infrequently nowadays because he lacks motivation. I just wanted to be able to show him people can/do enjoy his doodles.
My coworker came as me to work for Halloween
All these Halloween costume post and yet this is still the best.
There were some hecklers in Canadian Parliament today
Man-Spider, Man-Spider does whatever a Man-Spider does
Your horse knows you aint about that life.
This is Lewis. He belongs to a co-worker of mine. He is blind. She brought him into work today and said "he wanted to be a seeing eye dog for Halloween"
Be clever
British Train information boards are Brutal
Colorado cop with a great sense of humor!
May the spooks reach you, my doots
Hoping to sell out by the end of the night
WuTang forever
Last day for spooky meems! Also, happy Halloween
jumpscare
It's my first time making a Halloween costume: I'm a Rain Cloud!
My daughter wanted to be a Tide pod. Be nice - she's just an 11 year old.
Gutter humor...
We had a candidate interview for an IT position today. He literally designed and printed this shirt because he was interviewing on Halloween! Needless to say, we hired him...
Halloween is already starting
Maybe some DMV workers actually do have a sense of humor
My friend came to school dressed as Spooderman
Title
You got my back?
Honest student feedback be like
Ice T knows what's up
Vladimir Pumpkin
So, this is where it truly began
A few months ago my friend’s real estate sign was rudely vandalized. Today, for the win, she used it to her advantage
Some cop in my hometown winning Halloween.
Come on, guys!
‘Tis the season to summon devils
Spooks.
This guy at my school went as the principal for Halloween. The principal regularly walks around the lunchroom during lunch, so this guy did the same.
Anon at the store
This hot air ballon flew past my house
Jon snow on his way to the throne!
The hobbies
My brother and his friend dressed up as mermaid man and barnacle boy for Halloween
... gawk gawk combo...!
The evil of the internet
This dog is confused about where I’m hiding my left leg.
Meanwhile on Black Twitter
Pretty much every time
It’s not what it looks like!
Halloween on the ISS
My Vampire Costume!
This world is full of lies...
The vanity plate of this Tesla
manga
Open the gates!
A+
My sister takes Halloween very seriously . And yes, her dog is still very much involved.
Anon checks his privilege
Kyle's back at it again
Spoilt for choice
Easy profit
I don't know why she's not amused...
Killed it for you
234
well only one got the last blow
Can't wait to see the look on his face!
Don’t tell me what to do Skittles!
The housing market is really pumped up these days