He self-medicates with speed

Im a frayed knot

Ooh la la

The Most Accurate Picture I've Seen Today

R.I.P Manager

I'm going over to Billy's house!

a true utopian society

Why I don’t want kids...

These dogs look like they are the villains in a movie where a golden retriever wins a snowboarding tournament

2 minutes old and my nephew is deeply disappointed in us...

Lions are just big copycats

Alright which one of you is T-Pain...

I am out of H3 memes, I need to milk another oldie

First attempt at Ninja Bread Men

Excellent move

The truth

Can't you read the sign???

The face of a defeated father...14 years later.

I’m sorry for this

I always loved those stores

Ironic that my pup chewed up this specific cards against humanity card.

The Captain

I found a snowman at IKEA!

The Absolute Robotic Unit

lil b

Talking/not talking on the phone

High school feelings

Is it wrong tho?

My friend was diagnosed with Parkinson’s. He thought it would be funny to send this as his Christmas letter. His wife, horrified, added the sticker

Gosh darn it demons!!!

My Walmart has Candy Cane penises protecting the entrance.

"Can I go back to the shelter?"

Teach em young!

This basically sums up traveling with our toddler...Merry Christmas.

My annual Christmas photo with my housemates

I wrapped my brother's present in cement...

Yeah.. pretty accurate

Probably because he's a diva

Graffiti

No luck catching them drones then?

Merry Christmas from the Texas Department of Transportation!

I have been using it wrong all this time.

Children love him!

Tastes like chicken?

The dog park is really going downhill.

“ducking”

Merry Christmas from the Congo!

I didn’t realize my wife left the kids’ presents in the car until I checked the rear view mirror.

That’s really true as hell.

My girlfriend is taking this hosting Christmas thing a bit too far...

Kids menu at Lucky's Coffee Shop

Got my Christmas Present early this year

She: did you pull it out early enough? He: yes i think so

And a happy new year

Real Friends

Juniper got cold on the way to daycare

Typical

Made me pause

We told our 9yo son he had to justify why we should get a hamster. Here is his proposal.

Christmas is a time for welcoming everyone.

Gift I received...wrapped in a such a way that it appears as if Linus and Patty are getting it on in front of Marcie.

First encyclical - De Memeticus

We should expect everything

*carnivorism intensifies*

The lawyer who recently got nunchucks legalized in New York

true valor

Florida's a fun state. Merry Christmas everybody

This cat is having none of it.

Their true power only shows agaisnt themselves

Burnt 2772 calories today morning.. Feeling very good!

This message sign in Arizona today...

Risky

Undercover officer combats porch pirates

Either someone stole the ‘J’ or my Jewish neighbors have a sense of humor.

Squirrely dog

Post

Lots of love to give.

I don't think he liked it

When fashion meets functuon

Her career choices allowed for nun of that

no wait

Zoom in on the names.

How To Comeback 101

My favorite gift card

Cool!

Broke school system

Tob's favorite part going to the vet is sitting in this sink

My friend likes you...

BLT is the best sandwich

Hero’s don’t always wear capes.

nothing like the simulations

The Vacuum of Terror

She goes to another school!

awww a friend

omg

And they talk for hours...

spooked

You know what I call guys like you?

Disgusting behaviour

Good ps skills tho