The official mascot of my 20s

unbomb 'em.

Heroin.

Monday Work Motivation

Diana Ross

SnowBernie spotted in Seattle

Found a "Lion mane mushroom" in a nearby swamp. Gonna make it my new girlfriend.

The Two Types of Science

I knew I liked McDonald's

Apparently people like my ears

Thought I was being clever rolling up rolls into hearts. Turns out, I made a bunch of boobies.

As an engineering student at uni, this is accurate

Not even two feet away.

I stay

My valentine captured me taking a nap...aww

My wife sure knows how to make a fella feel good on valentine's day.

ending up single

Have a Super Valentine's Day

The secret is out...

Juts noe omre

tHaTs nOt cOlD

My flesh light is in transit.

Some people have a snack drawer. I have a Reese's drawer.

When romance is tested.

IT'S VALENTINE'S DAY?!!

Cheers to all the single people on this day

Get well soon.

Beware

Presh

Back off. You never seen anyeone lay an egg before?

Adult Lunchable

Local news with driving advice for Texans not used to driving in snow

Oyoy

Mr President, get down!!!!!!!!!!

Just a reminder for every one to practice safe sex this Valentine’s Day

Sweet! Costco started selling hair ties!

I, for one, like the new name better.

Unfortunate ad placement...

My dad messing around.

Tech valentine

USSA

Stumbled upon this while out for a walk!

What my girlfriend gave me for Valentine’s Day on the left and what I gave her on the right. We couldn’t stop laughing

Chessical.

Good one, Illinois

Valentine's day peti from my daughter! Bloody massacre!

That’s it.

Modern dating in a nutshell

Been there man

Is this the best name in sport?

Cupid Hackerman

Happy Stormtrooper Awareness Day!

Gib money plz.

dang :(

The horrors they must endure. Thank them for their service

My husband's Valentine's day card, versus mine

Explain this retard.

Public restroom wall changed my life

"No"

fortifying

Library helpdesk

Greatest hit man of all time

10/10 parking

A little rockhounding humor.

Keep your friends close and your FRIEND CLOSER

Lift your finger.

The Struggle is Real Man

Welp there it goes

Ill usion

Swab the brain for best results.

Happy Valentines to fellow singles

Snow Day in Seattle

Can you read this??

Elementary Infraction

I don't have enough rupees :(

Before bitcoin it was this...

Precipitation. The entirely scientific origin of

Mark hamill or slavoj zizek, the game

Ok, who's dad works for IDOT?

The meeting of the “Itty Bitty Hissy Committee” has commenced

I was looking for my stupid cat for an hour before I found him. I'm not even mad...

THE FALL GUY

Nope, Not Sorry

who even builds snowmen anymore, gotta build snow monsters

If only I was like Shrek

How to utilise Venom's tongue

Hired this dude to put in my grass - He told me he’d be roasting a pig for the crew. I guess he wasn’t joking.

Yes I will be depressed if I have tons of money

Yummy mushroom

Return to wendigo

Valentines meat tray for one

Don't ask for context

Every morning at 11 or so, windowman shows up and scares the shit out of me.

Chicken jerk...

So, I asked my mom to grab some grape tomatoes. It’s a 20lb box. Guess I’ll be making tomato paste, tomato sauce and anything else that has a frigging tomato in it for the next forever... 20lbs!

This guy's special request at my work for his food. Couldn't stop laughing!!

Superheroes

Another thrift store painting I painted on top of. Monstrous Love.

Trying to order a taxi to pick me up and he asks where I am....

Filed under M for Murder.