I was on Amazon looking at metal detectors...

Turf war happening outside my office

Patio Set

I'm beginning to question the credibility of my college...

The pool is open for business.

Finally. Something Millennials can't be blamed for. Thank Generation Z for this.

My wife’s cousin has an issue at her office in klamath falls

A gathering of all Dr. Pepper knockoffs

Oh won't you please take me home

I've found the weakest link!

Harry may not be setting a great example...

None of the parenting books I read warned me that my daughter would turn into The Undertaker when she tried to fall asleep

Chance of getting the job? Absolute zero.

:notlikethis:

The essentials

I can’t wait for humans to explore earth!

It’s been a rough semester

our

NANI?!

dick

The best translation you will ever read

The DAMN reflection she said

2Me8IRL

Infinity War: How it should have ended

Not sure if I should be offended or amused

My community college said it best....

Upvote for respect

That's interᴱsting

The Electrical Cables Have Spoken

Surprised it wasn't a Florida man

Asking real questions

Hello darlin’

Woke up in the middle of the night to a notification that my security camera detected motion. Cue instant heart attack.

Cats; The best way to teach your kids actions have consequences

Only Guys understand this

Get rekt'd mother

This picture hidden behind the toilet paper at a maintenance shop.

Murica

Saalt n Peprr.

I’m late to work...

And it always happens when something is burning on the stove

J U S T ᴰ ᴼ ᴵ ᵀ

Took this photo of my girlfriend and our cat tonight...

Teachers in Arizona on strike? The local strip club has got you covered!

Keep his name out your mouth

You’ve been roasted by, a smooth criminal

+100 style

Insta***

We've incorporated it into our lovemaking...

Cyclist signs in Germany

Clearly my dog loves her birthday present

The karate crotch windmill

The biggest crime ever!

If you Google Translate Monty Python's "Killer Joke" from German to English, Google dies.

Cheap date

I don’t remember Peter Rabbit being this intense.

Waffles

Press conference

I’m a secretary on a hospital unit today, we’ll see how long I can do this.

Dogs : Then vs Now

To make things clear.

Don’t let your dreams be dreams.

Dwayne “The Bach” Johnson

Where the pizza cuts itself

I love messing with Craigslist Scammers. They offer to purchase my items with fake checks, so I have them send me fake checks.

Something's not right..

Bruno you tease

Would take this to my ex's wedding party.

Waiting for the professor to post your grade but you already know you failed

I like this Airport Terminal so much that I took a photo of myself in line waiting for my plane.

A cause I can support

Part 1 : AWAKEN MY SHITPOSTERS

Not for weak hearts

What's red, bubbly and taps on glass?

Striking Resemblance

Resovolution

Transformation Tuesday...

One way to make sure parents keep their children with them

You got me there

Disable your adblock

You haven't eaten pizza until....

Must have been watching CSI

The Doctor doesn’t do guns

Meta même from the future

Dominoes delivery instructions for the win

Lumber Jack

I'm Ned and I'm Bed

Beautiful sce-

ᵂʰᵃᵗ?

Hippo Jokes

You wouldn't pirate a house

Rethinking Taxonomy

My friend texted me today with what I like to call... evil brilliance!

Important lessons about laundry and life

Finally know the founding fathers true intentions

Better start hidin' boy

انا انا

Aussie’s dogs ain’t vegans bois!

Still got the cancers

WHO’S THE FATHER SHELLY?