Being an uncle to twins is about two things. Understanding how to beat the system and taking shortcuts.

Looks like my local gas station is ready for a shit show

relatable

Cannot stop laughing about this

i woke up and lost

At this point, yeah

Found a Paper Bag With the Same Material as this Sub

My Ladie

No Nut Forever

Coffee or tea?

A typical day of work for me

My Halloween costume. Turns out I have a lot of unresolved issues.

maybe you can catch something

　

My friend is storing his cello at my place. I occasionally send him updates on how it’s going.

The kiddo and I went as Boo and KITTY this year

2000 IQ Lincoln

November 1st

Didn't expect the second box

tell us more

People better stop assuming things

Exploit their true weakness

Baited

When your fisherman friend invites you over

he is right

This sign Coke put on our vending machine

I lost

Tasty dancing spaget

its over

Ha, got eem

Guys we gotta hurry and prepare!

That cat is freaking

Welcome to Frankenstein Place world

I gotta get one now

I love Emilia

I dare you to decipher the third panel.

Dwight: You're not Jim. Jim's not Asian. You seriously never noticed? Hey, hats off to you for not seeing race.

Me after Masterchef

Fcuk Censorship. Well played, Stephan.

Monsters

The difference a day makes.

NARUTOOO

66a9777f-3eed-4747-bd6c-897c1fa4455f

Receiving negative comments on a post that had already reached -10

Nein!

I wish it was me.

It is

I think it’s supposed to be Jerk Chicken

Boi

He spend exactly enough time drawing that panel

Stay indoors

Cats, damn cats

The dress does it all!

what a nice guy!

*cries*

yes

Where’d thanksgiving go?

Put me down! I need to get to Target already!

The wonders of earwax

Peak season.

TEEEEEEE HEEEEEEEEEE

spooky

Asked my wife to look for a Chucky mask so I could scare the kids. She's too innocent.

Sorority Village is a dick poking out your boxers.

My Mom is cleaning out the library at the preschool where she works and sent me this

My buddy sent me this yesterday.

Oopsies

Listening to AC/DC.

wack

It’s the sweet one

Mini Wayne and Garth!

Kids have advanced tastes

When Mad Max meets Mario

Ryan Reynolds talking about his kid

Those cops gonna regret this when Donkey shows up

Guy waited his whole life to make this serial number

My new favourite thing ever...

Its just so interesting

Our two year old daughter. Because when big sis wants to dress up as Jason Voorhees, what better side kick than Chucky?

Proskater 2 boi

Lifes a ***

Doctor’s office got jokes... but seriously, vaccinate #Nursing

Terrified from the very beginning.

The answer was there all along

We won the Yuk Yuks Comedy Halloween costume challenge

Last year I dressed up as Randy Marsh

Damn you Carl

Hawking Burn!!

Could've turned out worse

Need a good morning boost?

Never forget Patrick Stewart dressed as a lobster.

How to Jump Higher

Roadworks? Seems legit...

Emojis...

The last thing he did before death.

Are you mad?

We don’t grow enough potato’s

Not a bug so much as an entire hive

Shut up nerd

Somebody give this guy an award.