For Halloween I had an inflatable cat on my roof. Last night it was very windy. This is what greeted me when I opened the door this morning. Almost had a heart attack.

Hot milky

Under pressure

The taller the shack the better the crack!

But Lt. Dan you aint got not legs

Gets away everytime!

　 　 　 　 　 　 　 　 　 　 　 　 　 　 　 　

yeet boi

Just when I think you couldn't possibly be any dumber, you go and do something like this... and TOTALLY REDEEM YOURSELF!

Method Acting at it's Finest

November 30th: Gandalf The Grey. December 1st: Gandalf The White.

Thanks for that Nintendo

EVEN WORSE

This made me really confused...

Decorative Pervert

But its litterally called like that

Brad Williams uniting this country one joke at a time.

Bread-eating vegans are party to mass animal murder

Haha she deserve it

Relatable

No need to be salty

Thanos Got John Wick Dog

Plot twist

I miss them already

oh damn

Introducing the 2019 Chevy What the Hell

At least wait until after Thanksgiving! For the elves sake.

When you are a smart kid.

Trying to live 1 day as a regular person

Job interview went right

quentin

Where's YOUR plane, *peasants*?

When your friends are ***s

EVERY DAMN DAY!!

college is hard

This poster is in the window of a pub in Sydney. Made me laugh

Sed cummentz plz.

Never fall for the hype

When your dad is white but wants to dress up as a character from Black Panther

Listening like it was the most amazing thing you ever heard followed up by 100 questions to keep it going.

ooh

Photo with grandma

try it it works

Napoli doggo

you cant denie it

pump

So yesterday for Halloween, this is how I greeted my coworkers... they LOVED IT...

I usually have to pay more

simple

Science!!!!

Tip for newlyweds

The ONLY reason shopping with mom was ever bearable in the 90s

so sad

dog anatomy

My daily attempt to listen to music

That time when Robert Downey Jr. found a loophole that let him do blackface and not get kicked out of Hollywood.

The cancer clinic my mom works for entered a Pumpkin Halloween contest yesterday, this is what they came up with

Do it

Gave out a lot of condiments last night. Costume=Candy, No Costume=Crushed Red Peppers, Grated Parm, Taco Sauce Packets

The best picture I’ve ever taken in my entire life.

Will-tle Debbie

Lmao poor guy.

Drawing a pair of eyes be like. . .

I won a $500 costume contest last night

Well, if that doesn't impress her...

Holy shit....

oh yes

We will see him again

Oh man!

Sunshine on today’s forecast

Accurate reflection of myself

Next, a plan to exact revenge...

My last what?

When Halloween is over but you’re still in the spirit

Nature facts

Never to early

Yep that’s pretty funny.

Wtf grandpa

Especially this month

Was looking at baby pool floats when I stumbled across this image. Is it just me or are those models in the background having a serious conversation?

Punctuation, problems.

She's not sold on my parents new dog.

Being an uncle to twins is about two things. Understanding how to beat the system and taking shortcuts.

Looks like my local gas station is ready for a shit show

relatable

Cannot stop laughing about this

i woke up and lost

At this point, yeah

Found a Paper Bag With the Same Material as this Sub

My Ladie

No Nut Forever

Coffee or tea?

A typical day of work for me

My Halloween costume. Turns out I have a lot of unresolved issues.

maybe you can catch something

　

My friend is storing his cello at my place. I occasionally send him updates on how it’s going.

The kiddo and I went as Boo and KITTY this year

2000 IQ Lincoln

November 1st