You will receive a bonus if you fulfill the contract without killing any of the prison guards.
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Angela_Merkel
Only the most Angelic comments for m̶y̶ ̶K̶a̶r̶m̶a̶ your pleasure.
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Pepe Collector
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Dropped the kids off for their first day of school and spotted this on another parent’s car.
I thought that was James cordon
Oh come on, mom!
precision
I’ve never felt more sure of a hypothetical in my life...
Now I’m sad
I’ll let you off with a warning this time
Finally, a safe place.
You’re either with it or against it
the gamer girl we need, but not the one we deserve
Get that premium parking gents
SCHLORP
I don’t think they serve those here.
A MOOSE!
Twitter is an amazing place
dynamite
Grandpa broke the floor
You fool! You feel victim for one of the classic blunders!
siri
O_O
supplies
Humans just dont get it
florida man at it again
Not again
Google never fails to support you.
So basically, this is reposting
That's fair
Is it possible to cure cancer using Internet?
Unfortunately my mood nowadays
SHARK!!!!!
Hate stepping on Legos? I made a pair of lego socks so simply pick them up as you go, pain-free!
Grand opening.
Ye old P-hub
As always, oblivious to the possibilities
Careful what you wish for
Plato, Aristotle, and Socrates
How can this fool enjoy something that isn't real?
Please Don't Yell
Might want to see a mechanic about that
Buying gas these days.
It wasn't by choice
MOVIE SONGS
I named my cat garbage.
I'm on TV
So basically, this is reposting
So my mates went to a Simpsons trivia night. And one of them dressed as homer and they sent me a pic.... And it's the shit nightmares are made of.
So basically, this is reposting
Moving up in the antisocial hierarchy
Covered in both instances
Savage james
Must’ve had a tough day
He got an A+
Wholesome
thicc apocalypse
This is my Natural talent
Please mom, spare his life
I have such sights to show you
This is what
Found my daughter's highlighters, couldn't resist:
HDMI cable needed
The groomer told me not to laugh at him
Perfect male body
Definitely worth the risk
They bite
Those meddling kids
gottem
Relatable
spoon
I was born to do that
Royal mom or not, Dutchess Kate is all of us when our kids are being little shits
This Brand Knows What To Calls Its Products
Diamond
Can we talk this over ?
Most true thing I’ve heard today
Indestructible
It’s snowing in Australia!
I can do those things
Rage against the reins.
RIP photographer
Thanks Charles Darwin... that’s evolution
Family circle has it right.
How does five hour energy work?
Dropping the bass is lame, shooting the bass is in
That's why you don't google your illness
The Shocker
The audacity of this guy
weird dog
Sneaky Squatch
My mom would sap the shit out of me
Amazing Egyptian ruins
Who else thinks my wife's new can opener looks like a strange sex toy?
Nobody gives a shit!
Cone of shame
My Wife told me to check out the new playlist she made me
On that day, the wind was broken.
Relax Karen, we just need some tips.
Die Ants.
Killin time!
From Guy Fieri’s Instagram: “When the flavor is out of this world”
My local butcher