*laughs in dollars*

Told my son that if he draws a cow properly I’ll buy ice-cream for him. Does he deserve it?

Did it in 8

This keeps happening

George, There's a bear at the door.

Just pour it in his handmade artisan water bowl.

Today’s sign at my neighborhood Chevron station. This is the only place I go for gas, mainly so I don’t miss the weekly dad jokes :)

I'm free at last

"Dafuq is this?"

Honestly shocked I made it this long

Happy new fear

I'm Lovin it?

The miniature you never knew you needed

Even the bat has got tricks

Summer dress

What's that long looking Eel that has choked on its meal? That's a Moray.

Pirates obey no laws, not even those of physics

I want one

a more accurate vizualisation has perhaps never existed

Kittychat

Sign on a localtrail. Pretty accurate!

I laughed for hours.

OOOOOOHHH HA HA HO HOOOOOO AH ahah ah ah ah ah aahhhhhhh breeeeeeeeeh

This season is crazy.

The best boi party.

Please sign up

Not unless you're a JoJo fan

At least the message is real

You know it's going to be a good school day seeing one of these in the front of the classroom.

If there was a Christian tumblr

Even these ugly ass bugs are getting more action than me

The view from my toilet.

What foreigners are afraid of in Canada vs what Canadians are scared of

Yeah no problem we got that

Marking its territory.

I got an Apple Watch for my birthday.

One of my favorite things in highschool was having a pack of zip ties in my bag...

My wallpaper was once me and my gf, came across this, now Captain Mexico rules my phone

I was traveling through the airport and looked over to see someone handing my kid a coloring book. I thought "How nice."...

Just how big an apology does he need to make?

web browsers in a nutshell

The univers

I gave my cat a birthday party. He was not impressed

Worth it

She's not wrong though

Best documentary ever!

Amazing Parenting

Sydney opera house when first built 1973

Brazil comes to you now

The possum’s greed

It’s Linus from tech tips not Linux

moon

Found a rolled up oversized portrait of my 4 year old self in a storage box

There is a John in every workplace.

rip black panter actor

The Kardashians are sweating now.... wait NVM, plastic doesnt sweat it melts

Elon Musk before and after Neuralink implants

Car sign in Germany

                 This title is far right

Wolfenstein's BJ Blazkowicz ran through AI driven de-pixelation sofware

Death Thots

Cleaning out my Grandfather's place and found this. Rest in peace you goofy pervert.

I think this tomato is having an identity crisis

Such a big dog

He wields power beyond the puny gods of the realm

My cat always wakes me at 4am. Today i woke him first.

Couple refused to pay their wedding photographer who then released these

Formula 1 vs Soccer

Yes

My local ice cream place cheers me up part two

How the turn tables

gas gas gas!

ideas are bulletproof

Bought a new bed for my medium size dog. This is not my medium sized dog.

Popcorned

Well... You can’t say I don’t wear a mask.

This gecko is taking a calcium supplement-not about to go on a cocaine-fueled bender

S.A.D.

A friend sent me this

Minds were not changed that day.

woosh

can't wait for the next iteration of the one joke

5-year-old me trying to see if the fridge light stays on after I close the door

*** you guys I'm going home

A Strange Encounter

Orange smorange

Well okay damn

My housemates response to my informative note

My 11 year old came downstairs and said she found a duck dynasty shirt in mom’s drawer to wear.

Don’t put it off another day. RIP Chad Boseman

Mad respect brother

My parents brought this sign home from Mexico, I had to point out the mistake.

Magical Reinforcement

just add tax

Draw me like your french girls

At what point can we start using 2020 as a swear word?

I miss the 90's

Time for horny jail

Biodegradable cigarettes helps nature in two ways.

I feel sad for the olives