You think things be like they do but they don't

"Yes, yes, we hurry!"

*random girl on the subway

What are you doing in my swamp?

Ya boi

Dancing Polish Gorgon

:DD

monke

Whatchu gonna do it about it, fatboy?

Midgets.

Fack

alternatively throat singing

I helped a friend move last weekend. She "thought" she going to put this toilet paper holder in the donation pile. Meet my newest yarn holder, Wilbur.

true gamers

Local bakery advertising...

Wife said I need to contribute more in house decorations. I happily obliged

I don't think the kids like their new teacher.

The guy in front of me didn’t stand a chance

America

*** the system

‍ ‍ ‍

I feel your pain, buddy!

layers

heh

Shaken not stirred

Women lmao

Can we stop.

Looks like someone returned to monke

A bit sus

Drinking children's tears from the Stygian river

I whole-heartedly agree

Starwars humor

Your search returned no results

I take a nap right here.

¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Where dem experts at

mvp

Protect yourself: spread the plague

Is nothing sacred to these people

Substitute!

‎

There goes my plans for a part time job.

"It's the side of peppercorn, and it seems your balls have been ripped off. 2/10"

plant

I tried to make Cthulhu pie but I got his derpy cousin

This gift idea

Accurate representation of Ottoman Sultan Suleyman 1

Just two cats hanging out

A friend gifted this coffee cup to my dad

*Visible confusion

At least it’s vegan

Over here it's a national past time since the current just takes it all to the Italian coast

Money doesn't grow on trees dumbass, it falls from the sky

Manlet king

Fake fans SMH my head

Graduating High School, getting a job, buying a house, and raising a family on a single income in the 1950's vs trying to do the same today

Why indeed?

Some people just don't understand the dangers of indiscriminate defecation

My dad every time he tastes something mildly spicy

ZA HANDO

Need only 2k to beat Cloggedholes, let's ***ing go

Another reminder that we live in a society

And the sun is rising in the east

My microwave keeps asking for sacrifices

Playing life in HARD mode

So secret nobody was able to find it

Beware of wife.

Schmood

My cat had his eye surgically removed so I gave him a new one.

He is pretty strong.

Had a stowaway in my bag a Swedish Fish.

Friends dog struck a familiar pose... I couldn’t resist.

Sometimes you really just wish a knight would come along and take the princess off your hands.

My dad built this to protect the tree from the cat

What are you thankful for this Thanksgiving?

It’s almost that time of year for my favorite album

Octo Pie

My old boy having an earth shattering sneeze

sike

#neverforgive

Mmm, free lunch

My parents better read the rules!

I asked the pizza shop to write a joke on the box. I got what I asked for but not what I expected.

Just outside a pizza shop.

A picture of R.E.M. my wife sent me. That’s her in the corner.

My Butter on seeing my ugly face first thing in the morning.

This sign was found on the window of a small hardware store.

Sent to me by a friend, taken off Facebook

Oooooooooo

As tim hortons is to canada

200?? Not bad

Before we lockdown we provided educational course for wayward children.

But thanks for asking

When she partakes in no shave November.

Biblically accurate

Best black сoсk a man could ask for

>:)

What happens when you grow up on war movies

Reminder that the queen of England is a direct descendant of prophet Muhammed (and therefore white)

Snyder Cut